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Hello. My name is Loba. I like nerds, and nerds like me. Really.

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Tuesday, August 31, 2004

How I keep busy at Work (lots of swearing is involved in this blog-fair warning)

I keep busy at work, aside from the piles of spread sheets that I actually am doing (cough, cough), by creating insults and nicknames for co-workers, and with co-workers.
Yesterday someone got dubbed Boner Face, and another Flappy Jacks, I got the name Hairy Taco, which oddly made me crave tacos-gots to love the spice.

Other people have been deemed worthy of such names like Apple Pot Pie (because of shape), Kermit the Ugly Frog, or Just Plain Awful (because it eats with it's mouth open, yes, 'it' is the correct term for this person) (because of oddly shaped legs), Corn Relish Camel Toe (just 'cause), Pooner-Poontastic-Poonerific-Poonerama-Poonpants (last name is Poon).

I've taken to calling my roommate's boyfriend (who was once known exclusively as the bearded lady) as Hog. Or Hogpants. Or Fucking Hog. Anyhoo, I was a little grumpy last night and I called him a diseased cunt. Now, I know the 'c' word is kind of gross, but I really like the implication of it. I think it implies that one is really gross, and possibly diseased. It works in other combo's, so I'm not just insulting the ladies by using the 'c' word. Diseased Ass is ok, as is Diseased Hanging Snot Turd. I just like the ring of the original the best. It really, really roles off the tongue.
Feel free to use any of these insults. I recommend doing it to a co-worker, an elderly person, at John Stamos, or your boss if you're feeling sassy.
Oh, and you're welcome.

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