Tuesday, August 31, 2004

How I keep busy at Work (lots of swearing is involved in this blog-fair warning)

I keep busy at work, aside from the piles of spread sheets that I actually am doing (cough, cough), by creating insults and nicknames for co-workers, and with co-workers.
Yesterday someone got dubbed Boner Face, and another Flappy Jacks, I got the name Hairy Taco, which oddly made me crave tacos-gots to love the spice.

Other people have been deemed worthy of such names like Apple Pot Pie (because of shape), Kermit the Ugly Frog, or Just Plain Awful (because it eats with it's mouth open, yes, 'it' is the correct term for this person) (because of oddly shaped legs), Corn Relish Camel Toe (just 'cause), Pooner-Poontastic-Poonerific-Poonerama-Poonpants (last name is Poon).

I've taken to calling my roommate's boyfriend (who was once known exclusively as the bearded lady) as Hog. Or Hogpants. Or Fucking Hog. Anyhoo, I was a little grumpy last night and I called him a diseased cunt. Now, I know the 'c' word is kind of gross, but I really like the implication of it. I think it implies that one is really gross, and possibly diseased. It works in other combo's, so I'm not just insulting the ladies by using the 'c' word. Diseased Ass is ok, as is Diseased Hanging Snot Turd. I just like the ring of the original the best. It really, really roles off the tongue.
Feel free to use any of these insults. I recommend doing it to a co-worker, an elderly person, at John Stamos, or your boss if you're feeling sassy.
Oh, and you're welcome.

Posted by Loba @ 2:48 p.m. :: (13) comments

Monday, August 30, 2004

Coke and Baguette Splatters

Had a lovely weekend with the Nerd.Had a going away party for Future Doctor, or really, a smallish gathering to have a some good times without the distraction of loud music, cougars, and 19yr old boys (we went out to a club/bar after). It was a nice gathering, we sat out on my (our deck really, I have a room mate) deck, but then it started to rain, so we sat around the living room and laughed and talked a lot, it was fun. Then we headed to the club. Most of us already a little drunk, or if you will a lot drunk...I'm going to veer of the path for a moment here, the first time I went to this place, many, many odd things occured. Someone got in a fight with a transvestite and her/his wig came flying off, I fell four times (I was, ahem, drunk)-the last time I fell, I fell on a glass and broke it, but didn't even know (!!!), someone asked my friend and her sister for a 'sister sandwich', another friend was lighting drinks in her mouth and burnt her face...So anyhoo, none of that occurred on Saturday, just some crappy (crappy as in I suck ass at pool) games of pool played by me and Nerd, and some dancing. It was fun, and some people we don't see often came out with us, one friend who lives far away and has the cutest children was able to join us, so that was really nice, and one friend got there about an hour before us, and was ALONE in the bar for an hour. Good times had by all on Saturday ngihtThen barfing Sunday. A ball of gelly. Yum. I was convinced my gall bladder had burst and I was going to become septic.If any is going to my friends site, www.futuredoctor.com, it's not quite finished yet. Enjoy it, and go back often but bare in mind it's still being worked on.Thank you. Next time, my theories on goat cheese, and why I should start a goat cheese revolution.

Posted by Loba @ 9:51 a.m. :: (9) comments

Friday, August 27, 2004

The Green Apple incident

Last night, had a bad episode with my tummy, I struggle with my stupid descending colon daily, and I have missed a few things because of it, but what I missed last night was really disapointing because I missed a night out with the girls, and it's espically crappy (literaly and physically) because my good friend, the future doctor (www.futuredoctor.ca) is heading back to med school. Man alive! I'm going to blame the lunch that the office brought in for a social event, pizza and KFC. Talking about over greasing the wheel.....Anyhoo, very disapointed, angry, and frankly, sore.
On a nice note, had a lovely birthday dinner for my Nerd (who will be hence forth known solely as Nerd), and did get together with lots of friends, which meant the world to be because they are getting to know Nerd, and he's getting to know them.
It was at a great restuarant, yummy, yummy butter nut squash crepes, spicy olives, tapilia, risotto! Soooo good. Nerd had sexy duck (that is actual duck, not my code name). We also discovered a wall of naked pictures, of actual customers, who have dinner in the old bank valut (restaurant is in an old bank for the 50's, and the old vault is now a wine cellar/private table) and if they want, and are drunk, they can have their picture taken. Naked. Thank goodness I only had two glasses of wine, Nerd probably good have been talked into (very easily) taking a nude photo. Sometimes he almost goes to work without dress, forgetting that he hasn't put pants on. Or underwear, or a shirt, or shoes, or socks....

Posted by Loba @ 10:56 a.m. :: (9) comments

Thursday, August 26, 2004

It's ok to have a learning disapility

Ok, so, it really, really is ok to have a learning disability, it really is.
I have never been diagnosed with one, but people tend to think I do, ie, the prof at university who told me it's ok that i have a learning disability, and I was like, ok I'll stand here and cry, I don't have one, but if gets me a better mark, keep thinking that buddy.
Right up until the last paper I wrote in University, from Kindergarten to Uni Grad, there was alway the comments, messy, unorganized, but excellent ideas-take time to re-read your work, and work on penmenship (or, in university, spell check). I really laughed at the comments on my last paper, because I did edit it, re-read it, etc, but there you go, and frankly I passed and graduated! Haha suckas! I did have a fear that I would get up to the chancellor at convication and they'd laughed in my face as the took the dipolma back. (they didn't by the way.)
Anyhoo, I wrote that story because yesterday I tried using the spell check and it didn't work, nor did I re-read my shit, and for the most part I don't care, just read, enjoy, and you'll get the jist of it. And sometimes the mistakes are really funny, and my spelling can be a source of amusement!
Just so you know, the title is done ironically (plus I just noticed I spelled it wrong....too lazy tsojfafjjjj)

Posted by Loba @ 9:12 a.m. :: (12) comments

Wednesday, August 25, 2004

Not a good day for the city

Well, I was going to write about myself a bit today, introduce myself, stupid info, it's my Nerds birthday, and the what not, but unfortunatly, there was a horrible, horrific, sad incident in the city today.
A man, early this morning, shot a woman in the head (she's 'ok', slightly injured and concious apparently) in a food court basically in the city's main transportation centre, right in the financial district during morning rush hour, and then proceeded to take a hostage outside the station.
The hostage was held for about 40 minutes, and the man step away from his hostage for a moment, and was shot dead by police. Not much information is available yet. It was all very sudden, and fast the reports are being updated practically by the minute.
The hostage is safe, but that poor woman, hopefully the stress won't be too bad, or suffer too badly from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. It's brutal.
This is yet another incident that makes you take stock of your life, want to get your love one's close, close, close (luckily I will have some of my closest, dearest friends with us tonight), and just rid your self of petty things, and appreciate everything all that much more.
It's sad how sometimes it takes incidents like this to make you see things more clearly, and really, for a city this size, we're fairly lucky that we don't have crazy incidents like this more often.
Apparently the incident was sparked off by a domestic dispute, but nothing is for sure yet. The identity of the gunman and his situation has not been released, we just know that he's dead.
They won't show the shooting on the news, but I'm sure it will be on the internet somewhere.

Posted by Loba @ 10:49 a.m. :: (8) comments

Tuesday, August 24, 2004

My first day of school, or, the day I got my very own blog

so, I finally have my own blog, one I can call my very own! No more riding the coat tails of my poor unspecting friends, namely, brown eyed wren, who I just wrote in her comment section instead of making my own.
Actually, let me correct that, I TRIED to make my own, but it didn't work, so I just wrote my entries in her comment sections. Good times my friends, good times.
Anyhoo, I then started dating a nerd who designed this for me, and I'm having fun playing with the settings, so I would stop swearing in his blog comment bar.
Soon I'll start posting fun things, such as pictures and what not, and write about myself in the "about" section, but right now I'm just happy I'm not passed out with all the nerdliness of this.
I'm not a big fan of the computer and it's strangle hold on the world, and tarded co-workers who can't use it, although occasionally I get hooked on ebay.
Check out my friend's site, www.futuredoctor.ca, again put together by my very own special nerd, she's a med student struggling with the mental Canadian system and doing her schooling in England.
Ok, I'll write something more fun later, just a little busy now. Busy bashing heads with bricks of people who make me angry. Not that I have angry management issues....you know how co-workers can be.

Posted by Loba @ 3:27 p.m. :: (7) comments